wow...

I haven't been writing for a while. But I have been dealing with alot. Sorry about the absence. I am so happy that the dance is this Friday (yes, Friday the 13th of January)! I'm elligible so I'm going. Paul moved to Stanton over the summer but his mom is letting him keep in touch with his friends. My principal is so nice, he let's Paul come to the dances even though he goes to another school. I informed Paul of the dance so hopefully he'll be able to make it. Jessie and Sam O. are inelligible so the only friends of mine that will probably be there will be Elizabeth, Chris and Corey. I'll still have fun. At the beginning of last year we had chair tests in band class. Someone was kind enough to puch me in the chest before my test so (as you can guess) it hurt to breathe. This was vital since I played flute. I wasn't surprised that I lost to another flute player. I was in second and the other flute player was in third chair. I wasn't feelin too bad about it. this year the third chair girl went to a different school and I went to second and last chair. Monday we finally had this years chair test. I had practiced the whole week before and memorized all the key signature's for my scales. (this time I could manage breathing) I did what felt ot me as my best when it was my turn. I played all four of my scales (memorized), the selected parts form my Xmas music, and my sightreading challenge. Today the results werer upon the door. I wasn't the least bit surprised. I had lost...again. I guess it wouldn't have hurt so bad but the other flute doesn't even care about being in band, her mom forced her to do it after she tried it in the sixth grade and asked to quit,she doesn't even practice anymore, and she has disliked me since elementary. What makes me mad is that I tried so hard for first chair and she didn't do shit and she got it. It wouldn't have bothered me but she had to be sarcastically happy for me the rest of the fucking day. It pisses me off because music is my only true release from pain, and when she interferes it makes me want to maime the next person I encounter, friend or foe. Well that about wraps up today.

Word of the Day
Martyr: One who dies for his/her beliefs.